Posted by: abake23 | August 4, 2009

For the record, I hate Internet Explorer. <<< Safari.

So im sitting here at work until I realized:

Writing on my blog > formatting spreadsheets in Excel to run mail merges on Microsoft Word.

All the news so far this morning has been very, very strange.

China has declared that all new astronauts that want to be a part of the next wave of space exploration cannot have any cavities, scars, or a history of bad breath. Now that is just plain funny. 

Washington Capitals forward Alex Ovechkin did an interview with a Russian television program, and claimed that having sex before and after games actually helps his performance on the ice. I guess you cant argue with a top 2 player in the NHL who has barely missed a couple games in his career, which brings me to this: How good would Tim Tebow be if he learned this secret?

pops: bang, bang, bang

pops: "bang, bang, bang"

A pregnant woman in Virginia got tazered by police at a baptism party because of a noise complaint from the neighbors. The officers also proceeded to taze the grandfather of the soon-to-be newborn. At least the reporter thought it was funny, leading off the story with: “a child’s Virginia baptism ended up being a real shocker!”

Next…25 year old intelligent dumbass Daniel Gonclave has been arrested for stealing the rights to the domain name “p2p.com” and selling them to NBA forward Mark Madsen. This guy evidently hacked into the godaddy.com account of p2p.com’s previous owner, transferred ownership to himself, and then sold it to Madsen on eBay for a nice little piece of “Vincent Chase-like” change- $111,000. Through all of this, Madsen still owns the rights somehow. Evidently Madsen buys all kinds of domain names and sells them later for a profit. (some of the domains he has been linked to are internetdating.com, denial.com, carbohydrates.com and my personal favorite: registeredsexoffender.com.)

…I guess thats what you have to do to make money when you might be the worst player in the NBA.

Oh yeah, and Super Mario and the princess have made a sex tape.

(For the record, this is pure stuff of excellence.)

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